A Box Of Human Sensation

Part 1

Ja, ich habe eine Menge gelernt...
z.B. das es Dinge gibt, die Ärzte nicht wissen...

I learned that if you never give up hope... there`s no room to say goodbye...

Ich habe begriffen, das im wahren Leben ein End nicht zwangsläufig happy ist...

Part 2

Everything keeps being so damn normal that it almost kills me.
There is this lump in my throat and it fucking hurts so much.

Gedanken abschalten.........................................................

and you eat to distract yourself from the sensation
and you fuck to get a different sensation
and you drink to kill the sensation

and you work and you eat and you drink and you fuck...

drink... work... fuck... eat...

und plötzlich ist viel Zeit vergangen...

Part 3

you leave everything behind... distance physically... and distance in mind...

Musik hören... Atemnot... das sichere gefühl bald zu sterben... alberne Fotos machen...

"I know that I lost controll... and I know there are so many things I like to forget... but all these silly pictures are stuck... stuck in my head... but I`m far far far far far too young... to be desillusioned yet..."

nach Jahren sind alle Erinnerungen verstaut, alle Gefühle unterdrückt...
Leaving just an itchy scar... die noch drückt... hier und da...

Doch außer Phantomschmerzen fühlst du nur süße Leere - und das ist wunderbar...

Part 4

I became cold and distant... without noticing.
Most people i couldn`t even take seriously. Their problems just felt so small... so far away...
but I envied them for their ability to still simply enjoy themselfs.


Aber dann... triffst du jemanden
Er weckt etwas in dir, das du längst verloren geglaubt hattest
und ganz nebenbei gibt er dir die Fähigkeit zurück
zu fühlen

Wie Frühling

of course he`s a predator that bites into your heart
of course he`s smart and beautiful an kills you with his smile
of course he`s got spirit
and
of course he´s awarded to someone


But even though it feels like crushing straight into a wall
It is so much better to feel this
than to feel nothing at all